The Sin of The "Snitch"

Silence and secrecy are often, in my opinion, the key ingredients in keeping any abusive system alive and operating. This also is part of the reason that when truths that shine a negative light do appear, people are not readily in a place to accept them as truth and real concerns are dismissed. Part of maintaining silence and secrecy may look different depending on the organization/group, but in general there are a few common ways of achieving the goal of abuses and wrongdoings remaining unknown, unchecked and hidden firmly beneath the rug they've been swept under and sometimes, expertly so. 

In order to insure wrongdoings are kept silent is to start with an environment that doesn't look too keenly on "unnecessary" and unwanted accusations being prompted in the first place. Within this environment, and in my experience, the Independent Fundamental Baptists, leaders constantly preach how sinful it is to sow discord among fellow believers. With this in mind, victims of abuse have the unwarranted guilt of being a "burden" to their pastor, church family and other Christians if they do come forward. From the beginning, their abuse and inevitably, they themselves, are seen as an inconvience.

Secondly, believers are taught that to speak up about something done to them can be selfishness on their part or an unwillingness to forgive. If they forgave, surely they wouldn't need to "broadcast" that very mistreatment to others? was something often heard. This is where the term "forgive and forget" comes into play. Being told to do just that is what many victims are met with from leaders and others in their fundamentalist communities.

TRIGGER WARNING: spiritual abuse survivors be advised 

A talebearer revealeth secrets: but he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter. 

Proverbs 11:13

Also, key to maintaining and even, grooming if you will, the environment where victims or whistleblowers are disbelieved is to have strong rules against the act of speaking up. Loaded language in the words of "snitch," "gossip," "talebearer" "falsehoods," and many others are a great example. These words when heard or spoken hold meanings that conjure up negative emotions. This, along with the ability to stop thoughts from being explored if used as a reason to shut down a concerned member's questions is part of this particular phenomenon in high-control groups. If a rumor of mistreatment of a fellow believer is heard it can easily be shot down if these loaded words are used as an explanation. It's a way to completely control the narrative and it's quite effective. Total situations have been stopped in their tracks and concerns are thrown to the wind, without any thought again. 

This is incredibly dangerous to any member of a religious community, but especially to those that are lower on the totem pole based on their status, gender or even age. Before full mistreatment has even occurred, they are at a disadvantage. Once a victim, that disadvantage has taken on a new meaning. Paired with that, becoming the "problem" leaves these individuals open to attacks, personal and in some situations, even physical alike. 

Along with all of these things, is the real concern that once you have spoken up as either a victim or a concerned bystander, you can be up against the accusation of being a troublemaker or a snitch. Again, keep in mind that in many groups, once an individual speaks up, they are labeled and marked. If you're opposing the system, "stirring things up," you are a threat to the standard way of doing things, to the very system itself. You are suddenly the proverbial wrench thrown into what is portrayed as a well oiled machine. And, people don't like to experience change. Christian Fundamentalist, IFB no less, aren't the exception to the rule (I'd make an argument for the opinion they created the dislike to it).

Speak not evil one of another, brethren. He that speaketh evil of [his] brother, and judgeth his brother, speaketh evil of the law, and judgeth the law: but if thou judge the law, thou art not a doer of the law, but a judge. 

James 4:11

Although I speak mainly towards the serious concerns of abuse and mistreatment, this response can be met with even the most innocent of questions, say on doctrine or opinions. I've wondered if some of the reason for such backlash isn't the actual questions prompted, but rather, questions were voiced in the first place? 

Having questions shouldn't translate into a threat of questioning authority, but in environments where power is an unequal structure, with no true checks for and balances, the fear of a power grab by others in the group is a real concern by some leaders. This shouldn't be the case. Anyone has the right to question and to do so without worry of even the slightest of negative consequences. 

What I think is a good example of this very thing comes from my own memory. More accurately it comes from a family member's who gave me permission to share this. Back in 2012, they'd helped to maintain a small online group of fellow IFB at the time. With their role, they deleted a completed event listing a revival service at our local IFB church, but this simple social media action ruffled the feathers of the evangelist connected to the event. One call from this man to our pastor and my relative was in hot water and was admonished for sowing discord. It turns out that this evangelist didn't take into account the date and that the deleted event was from the year before (included was a shout out of thanks to all who had attended, by the way), but because he was said to have encountered fellow pastors canceling on him, he assumed this was a malicious action. Unknowingly to church members, this pastor's own son, who was also a pastor himself, was facing rumors of sexual misconduct. That rumor included children, too. Whether true or not, I do not know, but what I know is even the most innocent of actions like deleting a benign social media post when seen as a threat or an affront to authority can be a real problem. Basically, don't be a snitch. After this incident, our pastor took to the pulpit that very same day and demanded silence of the rumors and that "his" church would not be a part of it, that he never wanted to receive a phone call because his members weren't walking a straight line. 

Too often, I've found those lines didn't exist and all along, we needed to do away with them. 

"Stay in line!" 

No, sir. Not this time. 

Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers. 

Ephesians 4:29

It's a sad thing when churches are not really a safe haven for their members. Independent Fundamental Baptist churches too often are the stone throwers for the preconceived wicked ones—the questioners, the boat-rockers, the whistleblowers, the victims, the "snitches."

The saved don't snitch. Translation: You're a sinner-not-saved-by-grace if you speak up. 

To snitch is probably the most unforgivable sin and I promise you in these environments, it won't be forgotten.

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